....welp, that happened

.....like, as a love entity thingie that's emotionally *and* metabolically a teenager, I partially get what he's going through

the thing with Connie triggered his insecurities about wanting something, *someone* to stay, because of what she gives him

then the thing with his dad triggered an identity crisis (like, how dare his dad create his identity from listening to a song, surely something so valuable should have been created by himself) that led trauma to arise and intensify

now he's trying to force his own identity through being a love entity, trying to help out everyone, avoiding to cause anyone to panic and worry

yet he's constantly overthinking about it all, and when the trauma gets through him: oops, Violence™

like just the fact that he seems to want something for himself can be so confusing and painful, obviously he'd want to run away from himself, he doesn't feel like a pure, innocent child so,so full of love and care anymore, not someone without any intent other than giving

he feels like his giving is an excuse for receiving

yet he tries to get that back so hard, he can't let go of that, that's the one thing he *did* get to call his own, after all not even his mom could claim she hadn't shattered anyone

...oops...

....ok I relate to that more than I expected

the problem seems obvious: he refuses to receive, because that's selfish, but that's also what he wants, and that conflicts with his identity

so he's now going through something kinda like what I've been going through

(if you wonder what my answer is to that: it's the thingie I posted a few days ago)

https://owo.cafe/@xerz/116057316682417879

(holy shit did I REALLY decide to watch Steven Universe at the right time)

ah

of course he became an abstraction

TADC reference haha yes

oh, and I would add, like, that Evangelion thingie

you know, we're defined, we have boundaries, we're systems

we fight against entropy, by the very act of existing

that means we have a sense of self, a direction, a need to self-preserve

and thus with individual needs

which are natural and alright

and perfectly ethical, so long as those needs can be mutually shared, with genuine will and consent

that's what makes life beautiful

Steven getting everyone to cry and blame themselves for that pain he feels also feels very Evangeliony

Connie gets it

...mrow,mrow...

...it's a shame, this feels so rushed

at the same time

they narrated it so well....

> Well, bust my britches

how does Garnet keep coming back with uncensorable bangers

and

there it goes

that was it

Future overall feels like it starts truly picking up by episode 13, with a few sprinkles of character development at e.g. episodes 2 and 10

honestly feels like a little bit of potential was wasted

still a wonderful message, for those that can pick up on it

and yeah, just... a gaygay watch overall

this one does get the 7/10